Saturday, January 26, 2013

Birth Story

My Dearest Olivia,

I am writing you this story on your very FIRST birthday. It is the birth story of Olivia Winter.

A few days prior to that day, at my 40 week appointment, the doctor noted no progress.I guess you weren't coming early. I already had my bags packed and they had been packed for weeks. I unpacked and repacked 10 times making sure you had all the right matching hair bows, booties, and blankies. I made sure your baby book was tucked away in my bag so I would remember to get your footprints stamped! The doctor told me that she would think about inducing, and would call me if she could schedule me in. It hadn't been 10 minutes after your Daddy and I got in the car that we received a call back. We had a date set! We were going to start the eviction induction process on Friday! Your Dad and I were so excited we called family with the news. We were going to meet you in just TWO days!

By this point, I worked from home and was able to get things ready all day. And by 'get things ready' I mean pack your Daddy's bag. Why doesn't anyone mention this part? Do people assume your husband, baby daddy, doesn't need clean clothes or toiletries? Or maybe it's assumed he doesn't stay the whole visit. Well, this Mama was on top of it!...and I was quite sure he wouldn't be leaving my side. When Friday came around with much anticipation, your Daddy came home from work to pick me up. Sydney's bag was packed, and she was ready for Grandpa to come pick her up for a few days. Mama was emotional about this because I knew that when Sydney came back home her world would be flipped upside down. We met your Mimi, Poppie, Aunt and Uncle out for the 'last supper.' The doctor told me to eat something good, because it was not known when I'd be able to eat again. I hope you enjoyed those crab cakes. I tried to hide the painful contractions I was having all through dinner. Olivia, I think you were going to come on your own anyway. If you're anything like your mama, you don't like being told what to do. .

There were a lot of tears on our drive to the hospital. I was scared, nervous, anxious, and realizing then & there it was our last car ride as just Daddy & I. As nervous as your Daddy may have been, he never let it show. Never. Ever. God love him for that. Throughout this entire pregnancy I was NEVER scared of the actual BIRTH part. I actually thought it was quite alarming at how NOT nervous I was.

We checked into the hospital at 7 pm. Thank god for pre- registration because I think by that point I wasn't even sure what my last name was. Daddy and I settled into the room. I was hooked up to an IV, and after the third stab, I was pretty convinced your Daddy was going to knock the nurse out and do it himself. Daddy laid down on the couch, we texted family with updates, and I flipped on the Jersey Shore. This lasted about 10 minutes, the clock read 8 pm and Daddy and I were admittedly bored. How long were we just going to sit here? Am I supposed to stare at the clock all night? The nurse came in and administered a drug to induce labor. UH OH, game on! About 15 minutes later the Doctor walked in and informed us that while the nurse administered the drug she did not feel your head. Oh. My. Lawd. She then wheeled in the ultrasound machine to get a look. Sure enough, sweet, stubborn lady of mine.. you were breech. Upside down! Let's rewind...three nights prior to this day I was up all night with horrible contractions. We believe this to be the night you flipped, dipped, and yeehawed yourself breech. Now, go figure, this exact moment the doctor confirms your whereabouts, I begin to have terrible, painful, holy crap, contractions. She said we could try to flip you, or go ahead with a c-section. Jersey Shore had ended. Daddy was bored. Giddy up, we're having a baby! Phone calls were made.

I never imagined this would have happened so fast. As they prepared the room for surgery, your Daddy got dressed in his scrubs, hat and mask. Guess what? Mama forgot to pack him shoes. Picture this- hospital garb & black dress shoes. Funny, right? He didn't think so. Anywho, they were wheeling me in to surgery and panic began to set in. I had googled, read, studied EVERYTHING about childbirth, EXCEPT c-sections. I have no idea why I glanced over this whole chapter, but I did, and I had no idea what was about to happen. As I sat in the hall waiting, and waiting, my contractions kicked up a notch. I wanted to slap your Daddy, kick a nurse and throw something at a window. There are NO words, and NOTHING to describe what this feels like. Nada. I give a lot of kudos to women who have a natural childbirth, but I lasted about an hour and thought my life was ending.

I am so very thankful for all of the nurses by my side at that moment. It was like having 10 Moms in the room, when you can't have your own. Your Daddy stayed by my side at every moment. He snuck a few peeks at what was going on (which is gross by the way), and snapped a few photos (which is even grosser by the way). We waited...and waited... and finally, out you came on January 26, 2012 at 11:21 pm. I yelled from behind the curtain, "Is it a girl? Is it? Is it?" They confirmed that it was true, all 7 lbs 12 ounces of you was a girl, who gracefully peed and pooped on her way out. It took a few back slaps to get your breathing regulated. You were soon bundled up and handed over to Daddy who showed me your sweet face. Whoaaaah, back it up! All that work and you look EXACTLY like your Dad. Pfft! Your Daddy was wearing a mask, but his eyes were red, and watery. Those are tears, sweet Olivia, Daddy tears. Few and far between, so these moments are EXTRA special. They whisked you off for your bubble bath, and some testing. Daddy scurried right behind. I knew you were in good hands.

The recovery process for me was a long one. I waited nearly 3 hours before I was able to see you again. The. Longest.3 Hours. Ever. When I was finally brought back to my room, you were brought in right behind. There is no sense of time in a hospital. Midnight quickly became 3 am, and 3 am quickly became 8 am. Nurses were always in and out, poking this and pinching that. A lot of the next few hours, and even days were a blur to me, my little princess; for some reasons I can explain, and for others I can not. As I laid in the hospital bed your Daddy slipped a bracelet around my wrist, and held up a page in your baby book with two little ink-stamped footprints. He remembered. At that moment, my eyes filled with tears for the first time. He was my knight and shining armor that day...and you were my itty bitty princess.


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